Top Ten Reasons You Know You're in a Coma

1. The World begins making sense - the arguments are logical ("We really can use biofuels to stop global warming")
2. You have nothing you need to do right now.
   
3. Children actually talk at normal volumes in your presence.
4. Your pets begin listening to you.
5. March is suddenly the shortest month of the year. And Mud Season disappears.
6. The Daily Show with Jon Stewart runs out of things to make fun of.
7. You don't have to agonize over your choice of three wishes from the genie.
8. The Doctor Who quote "Everybody lives, Rose! Just this once! Everybody lives!!" seems odd - doesn't it always work that way?
9. You actually don't worry about the small things.
   
10. The voices in your head suddenly stop. And you hear faint sounds of an ICU in their place.